breathing crazyness

I just dont know whats going on lately but i sure know everything is just crazy... 'maluka' my brazillian friend might say, i'm way too maluka sometimes, this friday i kind of did things that i never did before, like what?, nothing bad though but any of the 3 ended up good.. hahaha

- ended up in a karaoke with my getting-divorce-girlfriend
- lost my dkny jacket which was the match of my pants (good i didnt loose the pants.. hahhaa)
- got way too drunk...

uh? wtf i'm talking about, the third one is already a way of living.. who am i kidding? .. so..

I think i did sing, dance, cried, and came clean in front of my friends and some other were the first time i met ha, dang.... there are some pieces of that night that i dont have quite clear, and for sure i dont have the sequence but i needed it bad... my job along with my personal inner bubbles were making me crazy, obviously what i hated the most was the morning after, not cuz the hang over, i've spent years training my body to stand those, i can even eat eggs and milk, but the story of usually lately, that i go on my own, hubby wont go with me cuz he hates it, hates everything that means 'live' meaning, clubs with rockbands, live singers and karaokes, and to be very honest, this last one i dont like them either, but by the time and drinks went trough, i just kind of accept them, so, yah he was upset cuz the time i got home was in a strict point of view, a little to -early- for me, and way too late for him, anyhow, me and my friend ended up crying tears of sadness after we were laughing our asses of everything hours before, who understand women? not even between us, our sadness ended up being because of men.... and because we just have the 'regret' in our mind of not being very honest lately... but we made a pact though, whatever it happens, we will always be one for the other, whatever it happens, she knows about my silent unhappyness, and i know about her loud fake happyness, both things are not doing anything but damage inside our heads...
Besides that.. i bought a new skin for my ipod, the wireless headset as a delayed present for hubby's birthday, and lost and gained weight as usual, hubby is moving his workshop to a new and bigger place, and it supposed to get a lot better, i cant give my opinion cuz i'm those negative thinkers, but hopefully everything turns out better for him, he was doing pretty good, but he makes those kind of decisions, i'm just being supportive, otherwise i would screw him with my politics of doing business with a third party without looking for a contract and see that is all clear for all parts, but i just feel like aside and i dont want to really get into anything bottom line is that is his business and i can just only give my point of view.
On my job, everything is still quite cloudy, my boss is one big lazy ass who one of this days would stab our backs, he knows i know that, and he doesnt hate me but of course he kind of needs me right now, but once my team lead delivers the project on march.. i dont know where this would end..hopefully agains all the shit behind this, it turns out well...

right now i'm just going to watch a movie.

1r blog 2007.

No pude dormir muy bien de la ansiedad de mis pendientes laborales que deje el 29 de diciembre y apunte mentalmente mis principales pendientes mientras me bañaba y yo creo los apunte en la mugre porque llegue a el trabajo y ya no traia ni madres ni de mugres, ni de pendientes, este fin de semana aparte de convivir con la familia, ingerir alcohol, y aventarme a los dulces de una piñata, empece el 2007 con un ligero aliento a Torres X, el negris medio berrinches porque queria que fueramos con su familia a chilangolandia y jelou no!, eso significa como vivir en 'lo que el viento se llevo' bizarro, las mujeres se duermen en un lado y los hombres en otro lado, y el hecho principal es que ultimamente yo nada mas no encajo en ese lado de la familia, y son varias las situaciones, pero no me siento comoda, aparte el factor cero varo y que hueva ir y regresar .. neto.. mi familia decidio ir a ver a mi abue a celayork que tambien me pasa a cagar, por feo y tierroso jajaja, entonces pues armamos plan con los cuates aca y nos lanzamos de antro, estuvo relax hasta eso y al otro dia en la noche, fue el cumple No.17 de mi sobri-ahijado, como es el ultimo cumpleaños de niño, fue con motivos de batman ja, lo mejor fue embarrarle el pastel en la jeta y aventarme junto con los niños a pelearme por los dulces de la piñata, tambien me avente un maraton de movies en lo que el negris se jeteaba en la mañana, jackass 2, the black dhalia, the world trade center, the devil wears prada, slevin the lucky number y otra donde sale justin timberlake y morgan freeman, no todas ayer lunes 1o, pero la al menos 4 si ji ji, fuimos a comer un rico caldito tlalpeño al que le quite todo el chingado garbanzo, porque aparte de ser pedorro hasta la madre, me choca, y como no tengo propositos de año nuevo, solo voy a hacer todo lo posible por enamorarme de mi trabajo, llegar a los 52kg y ahorrar ya dinero.

Pero bueno, me dio ya el sabado y no pude terminar ese blog, decore mi agenda, le puse un sticker de mac a mi dell latitude chafa del trabajo, he bajado mas 'duranguense' pa cabarla de chingar y el concierto de pearl jam de telehit de el 2003 en Mexico, salgo con los amigos de la prepa y son las 6.43 y yo como que ya me voy a la rosca porque hoy es 6 de enero, los pinches reyes no me trajeron nada, segun dicen que porque no vieron el arbol de navidad, blah, pero eso si, ya me toco el puto monito en la rosca de la chamba, en fin, creo que ya no voy a mencionar a el negris mis momentos de soledad, y si, soy bien egoista lo se, pero yo supuestamente, estaba cansada de ir y venir sola, y heme aqui, en la misma pinche situacion, es esa mendiga soledad acompañada, por eso me ha dado por vaguear de nuevo, el problema es que bueno como que eso no le late aveces al mentado hubby pero entonces como chingados nos ponemos de acuerdo? , bien dijo la tusita, 'para que me dejas sola si ya sabes como soy'..
abur!